I feel very sorry for Mrs Duffy. She has been thrust into the national spotlight and branded a bigot by the Prime Minister.

While my sympathies are with Mrs Duffy, I also feel sorry for Broon in a different kind of way.

But the whole terrible episode got me thinking.

I come across people all the time whose views I deplore or simply do not share.

But they have a point of view and they have the right to express it and be heard.  I listen attentively and respond politely and with consideration. That’s my way of doing things.

I respect you if you respect me.

But sometimes these unspoken rules are broken.

Increasingly I find that people say things in e mails that they would never dream of putting in a conventional letter. The language is often fierce and confrontational.

How do I respond?

When I get abusive e mails I hit the delete key and think no more about it.

But if people express themselves robustly and forthrightly, that’s OK. So long as we don’t cross that line and abuse each other.

Here is one example where I got it wrong.

A recent exchange of e mails which tells its own story. I have deleted the name and details of the person who was in touch.

Sent: Sun, 18 Apr 2010 13:48:59 +0100

Subject: your campaign literature

One of your campaign leaflets tells me that you want to hear from me, so I will try to oblige and tell you what I think.I was astonished and depressed to receive a labour election sheet shwing that tired old photo of the Bullingdon Club standing around like eejits in their collars and tails.

I thought labour had accepted that pathetic "class war" stuff was dispensed with for this election. After all, if we are going to get into who's from which class, Ms Harman doesn't bear close scrutiny and most of the cabinet benefited from an excellent private education or the old grammar schools that they now deplore.

I can only surmise that the reason this hackneyed message of "Cameron's a Toff" is still on your election literature is because the voters of Pendle are considered thick enough to swallow it without complaint. What an insult! 

You describe yourself as "independent-minded": I see no evidence of that. Labour certainly no longer speak for me. In 13 years I have seen this country deteriorate to a frightening degree and the gap between  rich and poor has widened dramatically.

Please remove me from your mailing list: I can't stomach any more of this rubbish. I am grateful not to be a cancer sufferer in more ways than one: at least I won't be targeted for those despicable mailshots.

Labour have totally lost touch with reality and the electorate. It's time to go.

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Sent: Sunday, April 18, 2010 8:29 PM

Subject: Re: your campaign literature

Not a word about the tax cheat Lord Ashcroft which is on the same leaflet.

I take it is OK to lie to get a peerage and to defraud the Revenue of

millions.

And you blow a gasket over a photograph.

I'll delete your name.

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Then a further e mail in which I am described as rude and aggressive and more. I delete it and do not reply.  However, it makes me think about my own behaviour.

This morning, another e mail comes winging in from cyberspace from the same person. They are not giving up….

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Sent: Thursday 29 April

Subject: re your campaign literature

Having seen and heard Gordon Brown's performance today, I can see that dismissive contempt is clearly now Labour's institutional response to anyone who dares to criticise them, even those who had always previously supported them. I'm certainly not alone...

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I choose not to reply.